Hello and HELP!! My hair is frizzy and very fragile and I'm looking for a HAIR TWIN.

My curl pattern is:front and sides - 3Bback - 2C and 3Aunderneath - 2AHigh porosity - High density - fine width - long lengthI don't know what to do with my hair anymore.  When I was a child, my hair was a 2A.  After puberty - it became a 3A, in my 20s it was 3C (think Slash from Guns n Roses), in my 30s it went back to 3A. (My hair during my adulthood was coarse)  Two years ago, I went through a bad relationship and a lot of my hair fell out.  In fact, the only hair that fell out was the COARSE WIDTH HAIR.  The finer hair remained.  My hair grew back in with medium width.  A year ago, my Mother died from Cancer and during the stress of that I lost hair again.  Most of what has grown back is now fine width.  My hair is now very curly up front, with each strand of hair curling in a different direction.  I've tried:  Rosemary OIl, Wen, Argon Oil (I'm allergic to coconuts), various moisturising shampoos, leave-ins, macadamia nut oil moisturiser and olive oil moisturisers.  I've done hot oil treatments, olive oil treatments and tried to use vinegar and baking soda instead of shampooing.  The latest thing I've tried is Dove for Curly hair. I've tried rolling my hair in curlers (which straightens my hair out) and buying a curling iron - which I don't know how to really use - just to try to get control of my hair.  It's very embarrassing and I catch people giving my hair the side eye.  =(  I'm sorry this is so long!  I would like to find a hair twin who has found the perfect products for her hair who can help me.  

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