shalimarcat wavy hair

In my phone, I keep a list of things that have disappointed my hair in the past. I call it my “black list.” It includes:

Fashion runway trend haircuts, some hairdressers in my area, color, and chemical processing. Pretty much everything that is permanent, goes on my list. The problem with permanent choices on our hair is that we are human beings, and we change our minds constantly. I am an extreme case of indecision; I want black hair one day and platinum hair the next day.

Don’t mistake me–there is nothing wrong in wanting to change our look. The problem is that those changes are not compatible with healthy hair. You will damage your hair and throw away all of your effort, time, money, and products that allowed your hair to be in a certain state. Does this stop us from having what I call natural setbacks? No.

Don’t mistake me–there is nothing wrong in wanting to change our look.

I want to share with you my latest and most ridiculous personal setback ever–because even a curly hair YouTuber, with years and years of knowledge about curly hair and healthy hair makes mistakes on her own curls, too.

shalimarcat wavy hair vlogger

You may know about my recent keratin treatmentEven though the term “keratin treatment” WAS on my blacklist, I convinced myself that the new keratin treatments are safer and better formulated. And that is true: my hair was not damaged from the keratin process. The keratin treatment improvement does not apply to the stylist who performs it. My stylist was totally unprepared for the keratin service–and even though I knew it, I sat down in the chair and hoped for the best. The new keratin system by Goldwell lets you choose the strength–you can keep your curls and eliminate the frizz, or eliminate both. 

I asked my stylist to leave my curls and only eliminate the frizz. And I thought that was what happened. Apparently, she used so much unnecessary heat that she heat damaged my hair. On top of that, I discovered afterwards that she used the curl eliminating formula. Great.

Apparently, she used so much unnecessary heat that she heat damaged my hair.

I could not see this before, because my hair was really healthy and shiny. My hair is down my hips, and I don’t have a single split end. The problem is, the hair growing new on my scalp, is so much curlier. On the ends my hair is a 2b, at the roots a 3b. Wow. So, major setback: with my hair down my hips, I damaged my curl pattern. Now I have to transition all over again.

What do you need to remember from my story?

That everyone has setbacks.

Even your favorite, most experienced vlogger has them. One of my faves, Naptural85, just colored her hair and said she would not do it again. So why do we do it, even though we know we are risking our hair’s health and appearance? Because we are humans, and we all make mistakes. We also ignore our little “Don’t do it!” inner voice, sometimes. If you’ve had a recent setback, do not panic. Own it!

Try to see your hair setback as a way to learn more about your hair, a way to experiment with it. In the end, we were given one life and one set of hair, so it is ok to play with it, fail and succeed. You are not defined by the choices you make, you are defined by the way you handle the obstacles you encounter on your way. But, just to be sure… print out your black list and read it often!

This post was written by Nora for NaturallyCurly.com. Follow her journey on her Youtube channel, Shalimarcat and Instagram @Shalimarcat.

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